#shravs shitty dating life

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this place made me feel worthless.

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i think I'm gonna break up w him

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when he gets mad at me for calling Percy Jackson hot so he calls his literal ex hot

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yall were so right ab my ex apparently he's a porn addict now ☠️

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sent him a paragraph ab how I feel and bro said "I'm tired gn I'll reply tmr"

@yes-i-exist-shutup @theloonatic updating y'all

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kinda wish I had the emotional range of a teaspoon cuz then maybe I'd be less depressed

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crazy to think the 5 month relationship started with the shared love of the song closer by the Chainsmokers 💀😭

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HE CAN'T DO THIS HE CANT TALK ABOUT HOW HES DMING HER NOWBBC HE HAS NO ONE TO TALK TO BUT WHY AM I WAKING UP TO MESSAGES FROM HIM IM SO PISSED OFF WHAT DOES HE THINK HES DOING

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okay so when does the feeling of dread and lonely ness go away and I can go back to being normal

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my form of self sabotage is actively engaging with my ex and being friends with him ☹️

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me when my bangles give me a hickey

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@theloonatic WANNA GIVE U UPDATES BC MY IRL FRIENDS ARE SICK OF ME

we started talking again and like entertaining the idea of a relationship (YES I KNOW ITS A BAD IDEA IDK WHAT I WAS THINKING OKAY IM SORRY) and so anyways today he texts me after the whole day and he's like "this girl wants me to be her fake bf to make her friends jealous lmao" and as a joke I was like "so are u gonna lmao" bc I was expecting him to be like no ofc not lmao but he was like "yeah she's nice and cool" like WHAT.

THE AUDACITY.

AND IK THE NEXT TIME WE TALK HES GONNA BE LIKE "SO ARE WE STILL GONNA START DATING AGAIN" AND IDK HOW TO SAY NO

I don't want to be stuck in a relationship I have no interest in, being his friend is fine but I can't do more than that yk?

also I swear it's like an ego thing for him he has to be dating someone to feel happy and idk how to feel about that tbh

(sorry this turned into a rant ☹️)

I don't wanna be the girl he has just so he can sleep happy, someone who he never talks to. He's so like.. great in the situationship stage but the moment it's official, it's all gone and I don't want to be stuck in that again.

but then also it's kind of like... I don't rly like him? so I don't feel jealous that much? so like I'd literally be fine if he wanted to date me for the sake of having a gf bc tbh if we got together I'd also be dating him for the sake of having a gf which is like so toxic but still 😭

and also I swear he does this shit to make me jealous I SWEAR HE CAN NOT BE THAT STUPID

[isthistheendforus]

another thing I forced to be a sign.

(talking ab the tarot tiktoks that didn't apply to my situation at all but I convinced myself they did, the staring at the clock until 11:11 so I could make a wish, the stupid soulmate tiktoks I would watch, convinced they were fake if they didn't have ours but if they did then they were real and sm more)

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just realised I can't listen to taylor anymore because of him

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I feel so guilty when he texts me bc I know he's only texting me bc I asked him to

if he wanted to text me he wouldn't wait till I called him out on not texting me often

it feels so fake like this is what I wanted but it feels so wrong ☹️

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when ur happy u sing the lyrics and when ur sad u realise that you'll never be an all american bitch because you're not American and ur not pretty when u cry and ur not American and ur not anything and no one wants u and no one will ever want u bc ur not white or one of the fucking desirable asians because ur desi and no one wants to date desis and ur not even the pretty desi ur just there ☹️